“A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back,” says an ancient proverb about wisdom. The meaning is clear: from our desires, we derive our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Of these three elements, emotions are the most difficult to control.

All too often, common sense deserts us when we need it most to deal with life’s many challenges. We get emotional, letting our feelings take charge of events as our brain takes a sabbatical.

Employing the principle of transformation of feelings, found in Romans 12:1-2, coupled with the idea of renewal of the mind, found in CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), we can learn to slow our thinking—processing situations more rationally and realistically and less emotionally than perhaps ever before in our lives. As a result, we can be wiser in everything we do.

Imagine what it would mean to get your emotions under control? It might give you, for example, the chance to restore a relationship that has been damaged because of what was said in anger. Now instead of making everything a shouting match, you can get down to business and have a real discussion about how to overcome your differences with a loved one.

Or, you might be less prone to messing up at work as you take a moment to calm down, for instance, because you misplaced your notes for that important meeting. Choosing to relax instead, you put your mind at ease—allowing you to think more clearly where the notes might be. Even if you can’t find them, a more tranquil approach prevails, so you can more easily jot down key points from the report—notes or not.

Then there’s the church committee you’ve been asked to join, if you could only get past the feeling that it’s pointless because no one will listen to you, anyway. So you say no and stay home, feeling sorry for yourself. At least that way you will avoid the humiliation of being rejected. Too bad you’ll also miss the opportunity to make an impact in your community because of believing something that isn’t likely to happen.

You understand the point. So take a deep breath and see where emotional stability can take you. Encompass Counseling will help get you there.

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